And then there was 1

Bonnie & Andy are engaged! They will be kicking off the 2007 wedding season next March with a huge ceremony, complete with a climbing wall. Who else will keep us up to our eyeballs in registries next year? The race is on...

Top 5 Celebrity Death-Match-Ups, Literary Edition

i recently saw a performance of Macbeth and it occurred to me that, had Macduff really been borne of a woman, Macbeth would have beat the tar out of him. This led me to wonder what may happen if other famous literary characters were to duke it out in a cage fight to the death.

BATTLE OF THE SENIOR DISCOUNT:
Moby Dick's Captain Ahab vs. Ebenezer Scrooge
Winner- Ahab, all the way. Scrooge may be mean, but the Cap'n is downright gnarly.

BATTLE OF THE FAMILY ISSUES:
Grapes of Wrath's Tom Joad vs. Hamlet, Prince of Denmark
Winner- After a good match, Tom Joad prevails. Hamlet eventually succumbs to emotional angst and can't focus on the fight at hand.

BATTLE OF THE MOOD SWING:
Stephen King's Carrie White vs. Lady Macbeth
Winner: Just take a minute to consider how awesome a spectacle this would be. Carrie may be telekinetic, but Lady M can call on the powers of Darkness, plus she's NUTS. After a long, fierce battle, Lady Macbeth has the most blood on her hands.

BATTLE FOR SPRING BREAK:
Catcher in the Rye's Holden Caufield vs. Huckleberry Finn
Winner: Holden is aces and has issues with violence. Huck's just a good ol' boy. i'm sure his body would surface down river eventually.

BATTLE OF THE BEST DRESSED:
Scarlett O'Hara vs. Blanche DuBois, from A Streetcar Named Desire
Winner: My money's on Scarlett. You don't mess with the Irish, even when they're wearing corsets.

From Refugee to Runway Queen

Chloe won Project Runway! (i knew she would) (i kept saying it) (i'm always right)
Folks, this was a NAIL. BITER. In the pre-finale, Daniel was told he was too safe (read: boring), Satino heard that he was too dangerous (read: garish) and Chloe was told she lacked passion. They're given $8000 and a couple months to create a 12-item line to show at Fashion Week. Santino decides to be less garish, Chloe decides to show them savvy + moxie = passion, and Daniel keeps designing beautiful, well-tailored garments disguised as sleeping pills. 2 days before Go Time, Heidi, having just produced a human being from out her belly, decides that the designers can surely make a 13th piece for their line, and they can pick one of the loser designers to help. Santino goes all ostrich on us so Andrae (God bless him) basically makes the whole thing. It was cute, but that's about it. Nick and Daniel come up with a very cool shift dress with pockets (i've always said that dresses with pockets rocked) (i'm always right) and Chloe and Miss Diana, Goddess of Nerds, make a really cool baby doll dress with.... pockets!
Day of Judgement: Daniel can't find his weird purses anywhere! Tim says 'Maybe the universe is trying to tell you what i told you last week.' But he finds them. Daniel: 1, Universe: 0, Tim: 3 bajillion forever. Santino runs around sewing his models into the dresses, Chloe goes diva all over the hair and makeup monkeys and Kallie buries her head in the couch pillow from all the stress!
Daniel's line is first. It's clean, classic, and not very interesting. (somewhere, Winter throws nail polish at her monitor at work) Plus, his model du jour, Pinchy Face Rebecca, can't even walk in the 9 mile gown he made for her!
Chloe's is next. Also a little on the 'Seen It' side of creative, but her fabric choices are better than Daniel's and she's a whiz with interesting seams. Alot of gowns.
Santino introduces his line by saying 'i'm not just good tv, i'm a great designer.' i really liked his collection, but the tailoring was nowhere near Daniel and Chloe's. There was alot of good texture and it was definitely the most interesting, but not cohesive.
The judges eliminated Santino first, then Daniel. In my opinion, Santino's collection was better than Daniel's, and Chloe deserved to win, so i guess despite that minor disagreement Heidi and i can still be bffs. i was disappointed with all three collections, none of them lived up to Jay's final Runway from Season 1, but i guess we'll have to remedy that with Season 3! (you're stoked, i can tell)

This is what happens...

...when you merely HIDE the pin cushion from the cat under piles of fabric, and don't lock it in your gun safe behind the bookcase in the secret room. He somehow finds it and manages to remove almost every pin with his mouth right before you come home from work. Why? No reason. i think i would actually feel better about it if he was actually trying to EAT the pins, as i feared he was the first time he stalked and tackled the pin cushion, but no. He just likes to pull them out and drop them on the carpet. Genius also managed to pull out the few needles too, and i'm not sure how considering they don't have a big yellow ball on the end to grab. So if i'm only wearing half a dress in Whitney's wedding you'll know it was because i've spent the past few months crawling around the carpet putting pins away.

Top 5 Reasons i LOVE 'To Wong Foo'

Way back in 1995, Patrick Swayze, Wesley Snipes and little Johnny Leguizamo did a goofy movie called To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything! Julie Newmar. It's about 3 drag queens who get stuck in a tiny town and teach the yokels what true fabulousness is. It was on last night and i was reminded of how much i love it, so here's why:

Fantastic performances from all 3. (Swayze and Leguizamo got Golden Globe nominations) Even when Vida is beating the tar out of Virgil 'she' is the epitome of a lady.

Wesley Snipes. He's a huge black man, but he works it in drag. And the subplot about his character, Ms. Noxeema Jackson, befriending the tiniest little old lady in town is great.

The local romance: "Bobby Lee?" "Yes, Bobby Ray?" Cracks me up every time.

It's a run-of-the-mill feel good/happy ending comedy, which everyone needs once in a while.

When the Queens are leaving Hicksville, the emotional pinnacle comes when Stockard Channing tells Vida "I don't think of you as a man, and I don't think of you as a woman either. I think of you as an angel." To which Vida responds, "And I think that's healthy."

Movie Review: 8 Below

Starring eight fluffy dogs, a really scary leopard seal, and Paul Walker

I wanted to see this movie ever since i saw the trailer before Chicken Little! It's the story of 8 sled dogs that get left behind at an Antarctic camp after their humans have to hurry away and seek medical attention, fully intending to come back a few days later and retrieve the dogs before Winter sets in. Unfortunately, the biggest storm in 25 years prevents anyone from going to Antarctica, so Jerry can't go back and get his 8 buddies. Since he had planned to come right back, Jerry left them chained up outside with no food, so the dogs have to get themselves unchained and fed.
The story was based on actual events, but of course everything that takes place with the dogs is pure speculation, but i think Disney did alright. The dogs learn how to catch birds for food, and luck out in finding a killer whale carcass, except the dead whale is literally inhabited by what is now my biggest fear: a leopard seal. Cue awesome chase and fight scene. Max The Dog plays decoy with the Scary Leopard Seal so his doggie buddies can get some whale grub, and Scary Leopard Seal decides the best way to chase Max is to dive under the ice and stalk the doggie shadow running around over him. SO. SCARY. !!!!!
The film cuts back and forth between the dogs struggling to survive and Jerry struggling to find some way to get back to Antarctica. Paul Walker, while easy on the eyes, is not the best actor. But this one was hard to mess up, and i thought he did alright. He played it more about frustration and responsibility and not self-pity. He also had the classic 'boy and his dog' thing working in his favor. The other humans in the cast were alright, doing the best they could with a Disney script. Poor Jason Biggs was the bumbling, goofy best friend and it was painful at times. (Think Jar-Jar Binks.) i felt bad for him.
Anyway, it's a Disney movie so you know Jerry's gonna find a way to Antarctica and you know at least the majority, if not all, of the dogs will survive. What's crazy is that they spent something like 6 months down there on their own! Yes, it was a tear jerker on more than one occasion, and yes, there were some really cheesy Disney-esque moments (are there Northern Lights at the bottom of the world? i didn't think so, but i could be wrong) but it was a good moviegoing experience. i'm not the least bit surprised that this was #1 at the box office, everyone likes a good survival story. 3.8 out of 5 thawed paws.

From someone to Charlie to Matt to ME

Instructions: Use the picture you like best from the first page of the search results on Google Image.
1. The city and state of the town you grew up, no quotation marks: Redding, CA

2. The town where you currently reside: Elk Grove, CA
3. Your name, first and last, but again, no quotes.
4. Your grandmother's name. (That's you Edna Baker!)
5. Your favorite food: macaroni and cheese.

6. Your favorite drink: Dr. Pepper
7. Your favorite smell: my kitty