When Good Family Spy Shows Go Bad

Sometimes you have to write things out to grasp their magnitude. Take, por ejemplo, the Alias season finale.

The American Super-spies (they make other spies look like Natl. Guardsmen) are in Moscow where the Rambaldians, a wack-o cult with extremely high government connections (but really, don't all cults have great clout with powerful gov.s?), has used the genetics of an orchid to unleash a giant swirly red ball in the air over Moscow. This Uber-Gobstopper will, upon being triggered, poison the water supply of the entire planet.
Before they parachute safely through the Evil Gobstopper, Vaughn asks Sydney to be his SpyWife and gives her a diamond decoder ring.
While the two Spy-Geeks back at headquarters find an internet porn video of a Russian official to be used for blackmail in exchange for The All Important Secret Code to Russia, the better looking spies (too hot for desk jobs) are walking around the desecrated streets of Moscow. Apparently there's not THAT much of a hurry to save the earth.
Suddenly! RUSSIAN ZOMBIES! The Gobstopper has unleashed legions of them! They have red eyes and can speak English! Luckily their friend from NYU happens to be wandering around Moscow with an AK47. He tells them you have to shoot the zombies to kill them, right before a Russian zombie sticks a rod of rebar thru his chest. Dying, he tells them their only way to the Gobstopper floating above the city is through the underground subways, naturally. They will have to activate the Subway batteries in order to operate it, as Moscow is experiencing a rolling blackout.
Sydney asks Nadia to be her maid of honor, but when the Russian zombies chase them Nadia can't run fast enough to jump aboard the subway. Sydney prettily furrows her brow and wonders if maybe slow-poke Nads isn't maid of honor material.

Oh yeah, and a glowing white horse walks by at one point, in the depths of Gobstopper-Zombie blacked out desecrated Russia. It's apparently a sign that the Chosen One will triumph over the StayPuffed Marshmallow Man or something.

Fast forward to when Sydney has 4 seconds to unplug the evil Gobstopper. Ambiguous Sloane, still stoked they were able to kill his Sloane Clone last week, has to shoot his daughter, the now Zombified Nadia, who was trying to kill Sydney out of jealousy that Syd was getting married before her. Jack and his actually-not-dead-after-he-shot-her Russian ex-wife Irina are interrogating her somehow-Spanish sister Ilena (ps- their other sister is Italian). Irina puts a bullet in sis's head for calling her fat and tells Syd to cut the blue wire. YAY! The Gobstopper explodes into water and they all take the elevator to safety, which i guess operates off the subway's batteries.