P. Dinger

You should know by now that i'm kind of obsessed with AMC's original dramatic television series, Mad Men. If you watch it, you know that it is deeply dramatic and that the heart (and heat) of the deep dramaticisms is the character of Don Draper, who is played with seething intensity by Mr. Jon Hamm. If you don't watch Mad Men, this is me sticking my fingers in my ears and yelling 'LALALALALALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU YOU'RE NOT TELLING ME THIS I REFUSE LALALALALAAAAAAAAA'. And if you don't watch you probably have no idea who Jon Hamm is, because he was virtually unknown when AMC cast him as Don 'Deep Drama' Draper. You may know him as the classically handsome dude that keeps winning Emmys and Golden Globes for his work on a series that you are not watchingGOODLORDWHYAREN'TYOUWATCHING????????

Okay. i'm calm now. i had some juice and now i'm calm.

So this is mostly for the Hamm fans out there. It's a little outdated, since Mad Men is launching season 4 later this year and this piece takes place on the cusp of season 2 before the viewers learned about THAT ONE THING OMG! and THE THING WITH PEGGY! and HOLY CRAP! WITH THE DUDE! and stuff. It is an interview betwixt Paul Rudd (he of the often crass Judd Apatow comedic films but also the stepbrother in Clueless) and Jon Hamm and it is deeply, dramatically, hilarious. If you only know Jon Hamm as Don Draper, your eyes will be opened and you may have to read the interview twice. The second time you will weep with joy.

Friends, the interview takes place in a mall.

i'm pretty sure nothing substantial gets accomplished besides making the world a little better through funnyness. i think you should read it even if you're never heard of Mad Men (*this is me glaring at you*) or Jon Hamm (*looooong, heavy sigh*) or interviews. HERE IT IS AND YOU'RE VERY WELCOME. Send cookies.

Snippet:

PR: I want to know about Jon Hamm.

JH: Fine. I am an open book.

PR: You are. You're naked.

JH: I kind of thought that's how we were supposed to do these interviews.

PR: When I said, "Jon, I hope you're ready to get naked in this interview," I didn't anticipate that you would actually be physically naked.

JH: Well, it helps me to be emotionally naked if I'm physically naked.

PR: I see.

JH: Thank you, by the way, for also being naked.

Unicorns

(not to be confused with Rainbow Unicorns, the smash hit single by The Pretty Pretty Princesses)

Finally saw Avatar in 3D, and have many thoughts, the foremost is this:

Is the perfect movie too much to ask for? Is it possible? Is it ever-elusive?

Okay, that was three thoughts, but my name's on the url and yours isn't.
Avatar. "Changing the movie industry forever." James Cameron didn't just write and direct this little film, he invented the technology that made it possible, built the camera, spent years making it, etc. He created new species of creatures, had a completely original language written for the natives to speak, and made it all look really, really spiffy.

But.

With alllll that originality and imagination and creativity, there were some significant retreads. Por ejemplo: it could be called "Pocahontas Dances With Wolves and the Last Samurai in Fern Gully" because the story is not original. Also not original? the use of Papyrus. All those millions of dollars and no custom font? Weak. Also? In the story, the baddies are trying to bulldoze the good guys in order to gain access to a very valuable mineral that is otherwise very difficult to obtain. The completely original name for this mineral? "Unobtainium." As my friend Daniel pointed out, why didn't they just call it "Can'tHavesies"? Trust me, the dialog was clunky enough that the mineral could've been called "Wsdvdsoiewfjnig709" and we still would've understood the situation. Also? some of the stockest stock characters seen on a major movie in a long time. You have the trigger-happy cigar-chomping militant who just wants to blast everything to kingdom come, and believes that anyone in a disagreement is an pie-eyed hippie. You also have Mr. Soulless Corporate GreedyPants, who can't see anything but dollar signs and is ignorant enough to call anything non-white a 'heathen' or 'savage' or 'fly bitten'. There are a host of other stock characters, and really, only about 2 characters in the entire cast undergo any arc at all. Everyone else is what we call 'flat', as in, no dimension. Can't really do that on a movie of this size, Mr. Cameron. You gotta have story and dimension.

i enjoyed the movie, it was a visual feast and was fun and thrilling and all that, but it also made me sad, because it could have been SO much better; it could've been perfect. If time and creativity were applied to the story and characters as diligently as it was applied to EVERYTHING else, i would proclaim it Most Worthy of Every Accolade Ever.

Does the perfect movie exist? i realize that one person's 'Anchorman' is another person's 'Gladiator', and there are certainly some excellent films out there. Let's limit our thinking to more epic fare because a film small in scope of time/space/species can be quite close to perfect. Can an Epic Blockbuster also be a Perfect Movie?

(i don't know, that's why i'm asking you.)

On Decency

So you've probably heard about Pat Robertson's asinine declarations about Haiti and the earthquake. If you're unfamiliar, Pat Robertson is a Southern Baptist minister and the host of the Christian tv program, The 700 Club. Here's what he said:

There are many responses, some of which involve throwing the laptop through walls, windows, etc. Fortunately, i'm too tired and so the laptop and marriage remain in tact. Also, author Donald Miller already handled it well enough at his blog. Here is the entire post, here is an excerpt:"You seem angry and tired. Christ loves you. He is not impressed with your religious posturing. He really loves you. You don’t have to hide behind anything anymore. The good news really is that good."
Elsewhere, Jon Stewart reacted to Robertson and the equally tactless Rush Limbaugh, who decided to declare that "[the unspeakable disaster] would play right into Obama's hands" and that Obama's administration could "use [the unspeakable disaster] to burnish their credibility with the black community," both light and dark-skinned. (i wish i were joking, i really do) Jon Stewart, on Comedy Central, threw the book at these two jackasses on their respective Christian and Conservative networks. And by book, i mean The Holy Bible. Observe:

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Haiti Earthquake Reactions
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Health Care Crisis

Thanks to Misters Miller and Stewart and the Bible they quote, i have nothing to add beyond the plea to Robertson's and Limbaugh's fans to please reconsider your allegiances.

song 1

Wow, full circle. A year ago today i was sitting on the floor of Pete's room in Mark and Tracey's house going through the painstakingly-made top 15 lists of some of my besties. i highly, highly recommend having a top 15 'party' of your own with your besties. It's enlightening and fun. It's really easy too: you plan a date and tell everyone to come with a cd of their top 15 songs, in order of toppest to 15th-est, then you take turns going through your choices and why you chose them. The only rule is that there's no judgement. 14 Britney Spears songs and 1 Muse song? So be it. You must ascribe to 'to each his/her own' when engaging in the top 15 sharing circle. Anyway, we made copies of our mixes for everyone. It's best to plan the event a month out to allow everyone time to really think about their lists, because for most, it's a challenging task. Although it has nothing to do with new years, ours happened to be on new years and it's a superb memory.

i hadn't planned on stretching out the bloglist of my top 15 for the entire year, but i just happened to realize today was the anniversary and i'm down to my number 1. How keen! Perhaps it's a sign and 2010 will be a keen year..... hmmmm....

Song One.

You know this song, it's programmed into your subconscious if you were born around or after 1979. It was originally written by Paul Williams and Kenny Ascher as a soundtrack song and recorded by Jim Henson's alter ego, Kermit, the frog. (Wiki has good backstory on this song, in case you're curious.) Many, many artists have recorded their own versions, to varying results. Sarah McLachlan has a beautiful version and the Dixie Chicks prominently feature the original's signature banjo in theirs. But these are not my choice.

My choice is Willie.

As i've said before, when i began constructing my top 15 it was helpful to list a few artists i knew were important enough to my musical life to include, and then select a favorite song from said artist. One such artist was Willie Nelson, because my siblings and i were raised on Willie, James Taylor, and the Eagles. And because like everyone else born in the early 80s, i was also raised on/by The Muppets, the natural convergence would be the song of all songs, The Rainbow Connection. Is it a little cliche of a choice? Sappy? Sure. But i'm not just choosing a childhood song, and a 'can't-we-all-just-get-along-while-we-follow-our-dreams?' song at that. i chose Willie's version for it's musicality. (Kermit, bless his goofy heart, is not the world's most melodious singer) Sarah McLachlan's version is very musical, but too ethereal. i prefer Willie's version for it's grounded simplicity and guitarity. (Yup, just made up a really awesome word.)

It's a great song because it's a little melancholy and wistful in that Robert Browning 'ah, but a man's reach should exceed his grasp, or what's a heaven for?' sense. (you know, that sense? the one everyone's always talking about? no? just me? *sigh*) It's also very optimistic and inspirational, which is why, i think, i gravitate toward to the Willie Nelson recording. His voice is at times raw, at times wavery, at times imperfect, and those factors, combined with the earthy and bare guitar keep the 'follow your dreams' message from taking over and making it a very saccharine, very American-Idol-finale type of musical gag-inducer. i love Willie Nelson's voice, some songs much more so than others, so when i knew i wanted a Willie song on my top 15 i searched for one that i felt accurately demonstrated why his voice is one of my most favorites and this was obviously one.

Another one of my methods for deciding which songs would make the top 15 was the method of 'would i want this song played at my funeral and what would it say about me if it were?' i know, totally dramatic and self-absorbed, right? Whatever. This was one that made it through that filter.

Concluding, in sum, finally and at last: please to enjoy my number-1-most song of everness, 'Rainbow Connection', as performed by Willie Nelson.

sum of all fears

Our dearest darling dog, Penny, is a mutt of some sorts, but is mostly pit bull.
In case you've been living under a rock for 10 years, pit bulls are unilaterally feared and hated because they breathe fire and murder virgins and traffic humans across borders to harvest their organs and stuff. They're large, sleek and muscular, so they tend to attract owners who prioritize strength and, subsequently, violence in the same way small, curly-haired and simpering dogs attract little old ladies and girls with large purses. The different appearances and temperments of dog breeds are what make them the #1 household pet of humans; this is why it works. Anyway, pits attract jerks and bottom feeders like Michael Vick and that creepy guy who lives around the corner, and these a-holes rear their dogs in irresponsible, dangerous ways and then the rest of the world goes, 'Bad dogs! Inherently evil! Should be banned from breathing oxygen! Gahhhhh!'
There are bright spots: pit bull rescue organizations like Villalobos and celebrity advocates like Rachel Ray (hey! she's good for something!) and just about every time we take Penny out on local walking trails at least one person will fawn over her and share their own pro-pit testimony. i don't doubt that for every 1 local fan there are 5 people who shoot dagger-eyes as soon as we pass and move their children to the other side of the trail when they see us coming, but phooey on them.
i'm aware that there are bad pits out there and people are allowed to form their opinion on their experiences. My friend was a police officer in the Bay Area for 6 years and she witnessed things that will prevent her from ever being completely comfortable around pit bulls. i will probably never own a German Shepherd because of the time our family pet threatened me. Experiences should form our opinions, though, not fear-mongering or gossip.
A lecture is not why i started this post, but apparently i woke up on the defensive side of the bed.
We have a pit-mutt. We adopted her from a local rescue group who had busted her out of the pound before she could be euthanized; she was in the pound because her owner was a shady character and had been taken to court. She is needy and neurotic but also loyal and silly and affectionate and she's learning to catch treats. Here is a list of things our big, scary, baby-killing dog is absolutely terrified by:

-tape measures, both the hardware kind for measuring walls and the sewing kind for measuring sleeves
-ladders
-cell phones
-cameras
-hairspray
-wrapping paper
-showerheads
-small plastic tubes
-Furminators

Not scared of but maybe should be? Fire. Possums. Mormons. Don't look for the rhyme or reason. She's a strange dog, befitting her environment and owners i suppose. She's available for loan if you need some dog therapy or want to do a pit test run before adopting your own.

what do you DO anywhere?

We went on holiday, as the Britties say. We ditched our biological families and spent Thanksgiving and its companion days cavorting around the great northwest in our little car. First we drove through Oregon in the rainy dark. It was literally dry and nice in California and then the minute we crossed the border it started snowing, because Oregon has a HUGE chip on its shoulder and just has to prove that it's NOT California, thankyouverymuch. So it was rainy and dark for 4 hours and i'm going to say something, but i'm going to preface it with this: Oregon is very pretty. At night? in the rain? MOST BORING DRIVE E V E R. You might argue that any drive in the dark is going to be boring, but i disagree. There's not a whole lot going on in OR along the i-5 corridor. No towns. No lights. No signs to read. BOR. ING. (See the attached image that i took with my fancy camera at the most exciting part of the drive.) So go ahead, Gonies, get your angry comments fingers flexing and bring it on, but the beauty of a blog is that i don't have to account for what i say. (love you)

Anyway, we got to Portland in the dark rain and arrived at Erin's home and proceeded to play with Erin (hi Erin!) for the next few days. With the exception of our drive, the weather was gorgy (which it always is when we're in town (which leads Erin to believe we're witches (which i'm not going to deny because a lady has to maintain her mystique))). We strolled through the park, we shopped, we dined, and we went to Tony Starlight's Supper Club & Lounge and heard Erin's roommate, Tara, and a handful of other talents do Johnny Mercer right. GREAT music, drinks and food with just enough camp to keep the stuffies away. i highly recommend paying Tony and his crooners a visit the next time you're in Portland. After Erin wiped her hands of us we met up with Pete and Bets and enjoyed some boozy milkshakes and Por Que No food. Good times all around.

After we bid adieu to those hipsters, we connected with Katie, Bobby and their unborn burrito, Trixie True Trihub*. It was a short visit, about 16 hours including sleeping, but they're always super fun to see and they have the world's most comfortable couch.

Back on the 5 (which is an interstate) and up into Washington, where there are no billboards. Did you know that? No billboards in the state of Washington. Just trees. Oh, another word about Oregon: several Adult Shops (one with a 24 hour arcade!) along the 5. Kinda pervy, O-gon. Just a little bit. Anyway, Washington. Trees. No rain, but mucho water. i don't think i've ever driven through WA before, i didn't realize how spotty it was. Lots of inlets and bays and ports. i had no clue. (the more you know...dun dun dun duuuuun....cue peacock graphic) We made to tiny Bremerton and to Jason and Winter's lovely old house on the water. What water? i dunno. We're talking about Washington here, could've been any water. Kitties Lola and Buster were like 'Oh my goodness! Kallie is here! We're so excited we're going to pee our kittypants! We love Kallie so much!**' J and Winter took us to see Samudra, the business Winter and Kath opened and for which Josh designed the logo and i served as human resources consultant***. It was super great to finally see the studio and cafe that we've heard so much about for so long. Samudra was beach chic- homey and peaceful and stylish. The foods and drinks were absolutely delish, especially the fun iced tea whose name i've forgotten but starts with an S.

Wednesday night we went to the world's coolest grocery store and shopped and dined in Poulsbo, which is like the Norwegian version of Chinatown (Lefse included. Yay lefse!). i don't remember the name of the restaurant where we et, but if you're looking for a high-style meal and vino at a surprisingly good price, go to Poulsbo and find the restaurant a few doors down from Sluy's (not Slutty's) bakery with the signage in Papyrus font. (Yes, i know. But this is a good reason why we shouldn't judge an establishment based solely on its chosen type treatment) tra la la la....what's next...

Thursday morning, Day of Giving Thanks: up very early (well, early for a vacay day) to go to Samudra and do yoga for the first time ever. We were a bit nervy because we are out of shape, not very bendy, and have never done yoga, but it was a good time! Teacher Kath led a very twisty class- all the twisties squeezed our organs and then unsqueezed them so the blood rushed around and got our digesters ready for the big meal. Then we had Thanksgiving with the Mitchell/Niemeyer/Nicholson clan which included TWO turkeys, a delish ginger/cider/vodka cocktail, and a boatload of madly rad green beans. After the meal was et and the family departed, J and Winter's friend Mike popped in to say hello. Mike has many, many tattoos and is the main dude for a punky little band you may have heard of: MxPx. (Yup. It's like that.) We played Apples to Apples (which is a super game) and had a lovely punk rawk time.

Friday, we and the rest of Kitsap county went to the Christmas tree farm to select J and Winter's tree....which i just realized we forgot to name. (everything needs a name, except cattle, sheep and other creatures you plan on eating. i learned that the hard way, but that is for another blog on another day.) Perhaps the tree should be Trixie True. Write that down, Winter. i discovered that there is a breed of tree called the Shasta Fir (not to be confused with Brendafer) so that was a delightful shoutout to the RDG way up in Washer country. We skillfully attached the tree to the top of the compact car, then proceeded to pile all 5 of us in to the car through the only working door: the driver's. Teehee....lesson learned. Afterward we put up holiday decor at Samudra and ate a bizarre and wonderful dinner of green beans, yam casserole, and fresh Puget Sound crab. i'd never et crab before, and i'm still not sure i like it enough to counteract the squeamy factor of cracking the creature apart. Still, mark that one off my bucket list.

On Saturday i went to the dentist, which is what i do when i'm on holiday. The dentist in question was J, so it was fun, and i got prescription toothpaste. (How many people do you know whose teeth are so bad they need prescription toothpaste? Probably just me. If you know me. If you don't....Hi. Nice to not-exactly meet you.) Later we went to pizza and got drinks at the oh-so-odd Hi-Fidelity Lounge, where Samudra employee Vanessa LePapillon was performing. She was very talented and we enjoyed people-watching a Liev Schrieber lookalike who was trying to stay awake and sober. (Liev: "Cannnn i getnother Comsopotilan?" Bartender: "If you can't pronounce it you can't order it." Haha!)

Sunday we drove back. Boo. Oregon wasn't so bad in the light and we stopped for some Christmas shopping at Bridgeport Village. Whilst in one particular hoitytoit-yet-bohemian-kitsch store whose name certainly does not rhyme with Anthropolgie, a salesperson initiated a conversation with Josh about where we lived. Being relatively familiar with Northern California, she was most curious to know just what sort of profession the two of us professed because, in her words she 'just always wanted to know what people DO in Redding.' (emphasis hers) To reiterate, the 40-something woman selling overpriced mugs in a mall wanted to know what there could possibly be in weirdo, podunk Redding that would allow anyone to eek out a paycheck, so help her God. i was a little steamed. i wanted to punch her in her overpriced face and then run out of the store with one of the $148 cardigans****.

And then we drove home. The end.

*Trixie True is an in-utero baby who is not actually named Trixie True......yet.

**At least, this was how i interpreted the hissing and swiping every time i walked past them or how every time i tried to pet them they ran away and hid.

***This consisted of saying 'yes, i agree that you should fire the cranky barista who reads celebrity gossip on the company computer on company time.' And yes, this image of your banana bowl comes up on page 1 of Google Images for the keyword search 'samudra yoga, bremerton.'

****Clearly, i was conflicted.

song 2

Oh song 2, i love you. i love you more than all the other songs except song 1. i've found that i have an affection for a heavy down beat and chipper lyrics, especially in congress. These lyrics are decidedly optimistic:

"Bad news comes don't you worry even when it lands
Good news will work its way to all them plans
We both got fired on exactly the same day
Well we'll float on good news is on the way

And we'll all float on, ok....
Alright already we'll all float on
Alright don't worry even if things end up a bit too heavy
We'll all float on...alright already we'll all float on"

Tell me all about it, Wikipedia!
-The song came out in 2004 on the album "Good News for People Who Love Bad News." Asked about the song in an interview with The A.V. Club, Isaac Brock said that he consciously intended to write something that felt more positive than some of his previous work:

“	It was a completely conscious thing. I was just kind of fed up with how bad s**t had been going, and how dark everything was, with bad news coming from everywhere....Then you've got the well-intentioned scientists telling us that everything is f****d. I just want to feel good for a day."	”
—Isaac Brock, The A.V. Club

i love that there are two distinct halves to the song: the stiff, staccato, marching verses and the looping, hand-in-the-breeze-out-the-window-of-the-car, 'floating' (if you will) of the chorus. i love the way it's steps away and then jumps back in around the 2:30 mark. It's a great song to drive to because it's easy to play on the steering wheel. There was a really wonderful alternative rock radio station when we lived in Elk Barf and it would play this song semi-regularly.... just rarely enough that it was still special when it came on. Whenever i heard it then, and now (which is never rarely b/c it's always on a cd since there is a nary a station in the greater Shasta County area that would ever deign to play something alternative, cool, or indie) it instantly improves my mood 96%, which means if i'm already in a good mood, i immediately feel 96% gooder. The following is not the official music video, (i'm not allowed to embed that) it's a fan slideshow, but i knew i had to embed the song in order for you to listen to it, which you MUST, even if you already know the song. You need to listen to it now, in the context of MEEEEEEEEE and things i LIIIIIIIKE.