Glee

Just saw this extended trailer for a new show called 'Glee' coming to Fox. i laughed out loud several times watching this, the writing seems really great. i did (non-musical) theater in high school and can identify with some of these seemingly-exaggerated-but-are-frighteningly-true characters (ahem, gold-star girl). Plus, Jane Lynch. Can i get an 'enough said'? You know her from Best In Show, A Mighty Wind, The 40 Year Old Virgin, and 1,089,345,345 other things she was brilliant in. Plus, i'm a sucker for a good musical, but only because i firmly believe that 90% of the 'good musicals' out there are actually rubbish. Plus, i like saying 'Glee'.




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hipster 101

i've been labeled a hipster. This is incorrect. The problem is the occasional convergence of Actual Fashion (which i casually follow) with Hipster Garb. Certain elements of Actual Fashion, such as the reimagining of some 80s and early 90s staples, have found their way into Hipster Garb. This has resulted in the lay person's confusion of Hipster Garb with Actual Fashion. This is an understandable, yet grave, mistake: hipsters do not follow fashion trends (according to them) and are generally immune to labels like 'trendy' (according to them). To imply that they are guided by even the most respectable fashion mores would be to imply they are not 100% autonomously, edgily creative and is therefore insulting. Here is a list of identifying characteristics of hipsters:

The female hipster only wears flat-soled shoes: pointy-toe flats, throwback sneakers like Keds or deck shoes, or short, slouchy 80s boots.
The male hipster only wears heeled shoes, most often dapper boots that barely fit under their very skinny pants. On off-days they may wear crusty old Vans.

Both male and female hipsters only wear skinny pants. Only. Whereas the female fashionista wears her skinny jeans with tall boots or heels to appear long and thin like a runway model, the female hipster wears her skinny jeans with lumpy moccasins or slouchy boots to look stumpy and anti-fashion.

Hipsters only wash their hair once every 5.7 days. Their hairstyles range between 'complicated rat's nest' and 'complicated bed head'. Natural dirt, oil, and grease are always a styling factor. This results in a generally dull sheen because they are contrary to traditional social structures of Dick-and-Jane cleanliness.

When they are not drinking espresso or coffee they made in their French press, hipsters drink beer. Most are committed to the most obscure microbrews they can find; the more ironic hipster subsets drink Natty Ice or other canned varieties to indicate they are not bound by quaint conventions of Quality or Independence.

Hipsters wear thick-rimmed glasses, a la Ryan Adams, but that's not where they got the idea. Even though most of them worship Ryan Adams.

All hipsters are either in a band, dating someone who is in a band, or live with someone who is either in a band or is dating someone in a band. They are committed to their art, or to the art of the person they are dating.

Hipsters name their babies Roscoe and Clementine.

Hipster males are likely to sport fungal mustaches. Hipster females may have sleeve tattoos.

Now you may be able to spot the hipsters in your neighborhood! For further reference, see these quality indexes of observation. If there are an alarming number of hipsters congregating at your local coffee shop, a purebred dog released into the group will disperse them promptly. If you are confronted by one, using the term 'hipster' will render the same effect as thrusting a crucifix at a vampire. If you're afraid you're in danger of becoming a hipster, immediately stop finding ways to be ironic. Inject generalities of all kinds into your life. Wear cargo shorts. Examine your pictures and journals from junior high when being awkward and nerdy was actually real and horrible and not a cheeky way to be an individual.

And here in their glory are The Hipster Olympics:

it grooooooooows!

things with which i am indeed on board

My cat hunting crane flies in the yard

Schedules

The ending of the Stop Loss program

Eyeliner

Fictional time travel

My friends having healthy, happy babies

Kirk Douglas movies

Granola and yogurt being the new peanut butter and jelly

Reversible clothing

Ceiling fans

Rosemary as a garnish

When my dog looks goofily naked because she's not wearing her collar

All things Dyson

Parmesan cheese dipped in honey

Song #10

Getting back to the countdown of my recently created Top 15 Songs, we are finally cracking the top 10. Coming on the heels of Mr. Ray and his immortal ode to Georgia, we have David Grey and my favorite of his many contributions to Life As We Know It. Here we have 'This Year's Love'. i love the way this one rocks back and forth, and even though the lyrics are kind of standard love song fare, i think they're quality all the same and a great fit to the melody. i really dislike the video and find it a terrible distraction from the song, but i don't know how to embed just the song into a blog post, so i recommend starting the clip yet not watching the cheesy video.

full sun

We are attempting to grow stuff! Alarmingly, it's kind of our first attempt in almost 5 years of marriage. You could say that we 'grew' Cosmo, but since he started out as a tiny, happy kitty with short hair and is now an angry behemoth swamp thing that frightens small children, i'd say we failed at that. Penny was already full grown when we adopted her, and thank Jebus because we probably would've screwed her up. i killed some cacti that we tried to grow in the house and that's been about it. Frankencat viciously stalks and attacks any flowers we put in vases, so plants around the house is kind of a lost cause. Now we're turning over a new leaf (if we can get a single leaf). We bought some seeds, bought some dirt, and are on our way to veggies! (hopefully) Come back for the harvest; it should be ....unique.

things with which i am just not on board

Commercials that try to combine beer and exercise into one lifestyle

Those platform flip-flops made of foam

Anne Hathaway

Using ellipses instead of real punctuation to communicate your hipster thoughtfulness...

Twitter

The canine version of racial profiling

The return of scrunchies

Flooding

Judd Apatow movies and their revolving casts.

People talking about 'times like these'

That sedan across the street from our house that NEVER MOVES and makes it impossible for us to U-turn

Leggings

Reality tv shows featuring competing chefs. What is the draw??? you can't taste what they made!!

Noisy frogs

Pretty much anything pertaining to Jane Austen

Churches that only ever teach on 'scandalous', 'controversial' topics. They're like celebrities who blab on and on about being 'real' or supermodels who crow about being ugly in 7th grade

Daggers

Cat dreadlocks